just some random thoughts

I often wonder how people survived in the past without the things that simplify our lives today...baby monitors, the INTERNET, my goodness how did they live w/out the internet, cars, bartering (man wish we did that more)...lots of things....

I also wonder why people who don't agree with what other people think, feel a need to go out of their way to tell people what they think is wrong, when maybe they could just us on telling people what they themselves actually think, instead of worrying about others, focus on your thoughts? I dunno, maybe that's my version of being judgemental too.

how to balance "living" with budgeting and not being excessive...yeah...not easy.

prioritizing family over yourself as an individual.  it's not that hard for me most of the time I'm happy to put my children and husband first.  When it becomes hard though...it's hard...I've found the solution for me is other Mom's....just time w/ other Mom's while our kiddos play together goes a LONG way!

sleep...oh how I miss sleep sometimes...but it's a worthwhile sacrifice to make sure my children feel loved when they need a snuggle at night and it's always worth it to stay up a bit later to have real time with my husband without interruption...SO worth it.  I'm often surprised by what can still be accomplished even w/very little sleep...God is good, he helps us to be the best mother and wife we can be if we let Him.

Friends...they matter.  Not just so you can say you have friends although that is nice. They really are a support system that is different than your family and a necessary one.  I have found that  one really good friend is truly a blessing, and if you can find more than one...you are truly lucky!

Money, there really is never enough...people spend what they make, their budgets increase when their finances increase.  It's just the nature of the beast I think.  However I can tell you that I am learning lots of ways to make the most of our limited finances so that our family can enjoy time together and still do fun things....it's a challenge...I'm trying to embrace :)

I know lots of random thoughts, nobody reads this anyways...so it's a good place for me to not worry about punctuation and capitolization and even spelling...and for me to get some thoughts out of my head :)

Whenever I hear...

Paisley's laugh...I smile

Whenever I see...

Claire smile with her whole body...I smile

Whenever I touch...

my husband's wedding band...I smile

Whenever I feel...

Overwhelmed by my blessings...I smile

Whenever I smell....

baked goods....I smile

I feel really blessed even with the hard parts of being a mother, I can't help but feel blessed.  My heart is full and I am so grateful for the Christmas Season.  People spend more time thinking about what they can give...and what they have and being grateful!  I'm especially grateful that myself and my family are healthy and can feel and smell and sing and laugh...

I'm grateful for so many things...and that makes me smile :-D

and time passes on...

Often times we go through life not really noticing our little blessings.  You know the simple things.

Babies laughing
Husband/wife smiling
Snuggling on the couch
Cooking with your husband/wife
Toddler napping
Happy in life (that doesn't mean you have everything you want...just what you need)
Car starts when you want it too
Redbox (lol)

That's a short list and certainly we all appreciate different things.  For me lately I've really been reminded how much I have to be grateful for in my life.  First and foremost, my marriage.  Some people don't have it as easy as I do.  Don't get me wrong, we work at our marriage all the time and fortunately BOTH of us try really hard to make sure it is a priority and a joy.  That being said, I have a husband who is amazing and wonderful.  He doesn't sweat the small stuff and I'm learning to be better at that because of him. 

I've noticed as a worrier myself, that I can actually make myself sick with worry.  That doesn't really happen to Jake...and it sure seems like a nice way to live life!  I think as human beings we have a tendency to really "live" in the sorrow, sadness, pain, darkness...whatever you want to call it.  My Dad would say "Wo is me"...lots would call it a "pity party".  We tend to focus on what we don't have, how we were short-changed, and even how we just aren't as lucky as so-and-so in life. 

Why is that? 

I offer a different solution...and mind you, I don't think it's my own.  I've just come to a better understanding of this philosphy.

LIVE, like there's no tomorrow

Seriously.  When you don't have an opportunity to fix/change something you tend to accept it and move on.  AND you work harder to be around people and things you enjoy, you pay more attention to what and who those things and people are and you APPRECIATE them!

Lots of people say marriage is 50/50.  I totally disagree!  Marriage is 100/100.  If I am putting 100% of my energy/efforts into meeting the needs of my spouse and to creating a comfortable and happy environment and my spouse is doing the same....BOTH our needs are met and we are happy and comfortable.  I like the sound of that!  (now I can't control if we have a screaming toddler some of the time...so I have to be reasonable).

And here's another thing I read that really struck me:

"Spend your time getting to know your spouse NOT trying to change them."

WHAT...?  I know totally profound right!?!  It kind of goes hand in hand with that saying "accept the things you cannot change....yada yada yada".  I've been blessed to have learned a bit from my previous long relationships prior to my marriage.  Hard times, poor decisions, sad times and did I mention POOR DECISIONS?  However, I've learned to really try to embrace the things that I've been through/put myself through.  I wouldn't function in a relationship now if I hadn't figured out how I was not functioning in my previous relationships.  Of course this is an ongoing journey..."such is life" :)

What I hope for my life is that time doesn't just pass on.  I hope it's marked with lots and lots of memories and good times and that none of it is wasted (or at least very little) wallowing in self pity for the things I can't control especially. 

Sometimes we need to just take a moment and "live" in our pain, whatever it may be, and I'm a believer in letting yourself feel....for a moment.  Then pick yourself up or let someone help you up and LIVE, really live.

Because if there is one thing we truly cannot control it's that....time passes on.

Things I hope I remember about new babies...

Being pregnant just makes me think of the things I want to remember when I'm in the heat of the moment, ya know, with Paisley pulling on my pant leg and #2 crying.

So I thought I'd make a list of the things I want to remember....in those moments especially!

-sleep...when you can...sleep
-with a newborn it can only be a few things that you have control over:
       1-diaper change
       2-tired
       3-empty or full belly (food or mylicon)
       4-hot or cold
       5-diaper change (I say this twice because it seems like it was more often than not...this problem)
-it's okay to want to hold your baby all the time
-it's okay to put your baby down
-look at your baby...even when they are crying...it will help...you will "see" them
-smile at your baby all the time
-ask for help!!!
-remind yourself..."I am the expert on my baby"...because you are, nobody else is around them like you are...
-get lots of advice THEN choose what you think/know will work for you and your baby...there's so much advice our there because different things work for different people!
-breathe
-sing to your baby, to yourself...whenever you can...it lightens your heart

I'm sure there is more...I will have to do this again...it's nice to feel like I have something to offer myself and my children.  I'm a pretty good Mom...because I try to be, because I want to be, because I was meant to be.

our minds can only focus on one thing at a time....

Jake and I were talking about being positive in a marriage.  I mentioned I'd read in a lesson manual that if we focus on the positives of our spouse it will make it easier to forgive their shortcomings.  He said he learned in school (can't remember which class) that the human brain really can only focus on one thing at a time.  Multi-tasking is really just an ability to switch between multiple things/thoughts quickly. 

That made a lot of sense to me, because I could often say that when I'm multi-tasking the things I am doing are not really getting done as well as they could.  I would imagine that's because they aren't being alotted my real attention :)

SO....if we focus on the positive attributes of our spouse...while we are doing that, we really won't be able to focus on the negative...sounds good to me!

Of course as I am writing this the darn light in the living room above me is flickering and I can't help but wonder if every time I think about that I am removing some of my thought power to write this post :)

Simple Words....

This morning my husband reminded me how easy it is to bring joy to each other.  This morning as both of us were sleep deprived for different reasons he had to get out of bed before me to meet someone.  He prepared himself for the morning and took a break or two from that to rub my back and play with my hair two things I love a lot!  Then he said "I think I don't tell you often enough how pretty you are."  What a great thing for him to say, especially since I've been feeling quite green as of late.

It reminded me that we don't have to have money or even a lot of time to show our spouse some love. 

Quentin L. Cook said in this most recent General Conference, "we can spend our lives trying to be more loving and kind, regardless of the adversity we face" and it moved me when I heard it and my darling husband reminded me of that this morning.  Now sleep deprivation may not seem like a huge adversity, but as of late I'll tell you what, it is feeling like quite the challenge for me!

It doesn't take much to show some love....sometimes all it takes is a few simple words :)

being grateful

The ensign had some amazing articles in it ....  I especially needed the one on showing gratitude and enduring WELL.

What a concept huh?  To endure well.  It's not the first time I've heard it nor will it be the last, but man it was what I needed.  I'm telling you, I have lots to be grateful for and that makes it easier to endure well.

So today I'm listing a few things I'm grateful for...

First and foremost I'm grateful for Jacob.  I don't know how I'd make it through many things without him.  He is kind and loving and he takes such good care of Paisley and I.  Sometimes I don't know how he does it.  Especially right now with me feeling crummy being pregnant.  He just endures well I think :)

I'm also grateful for the gospel and the impact it has had on my life and others too.  As I am surrounded by things that would be otherwise unbearable (death of a loved one being at the top of my mind lately), I am grateful for the peace the gospel brings in my life.  We are also waiting to hear back from dental schools and boy is that stressful AND I've learned through countless experiences that "everything will be okay".  So we are anxiously awaiting that news and grateful for the comfort that comes from knowing our Heavenly Father knows us and is watching out for us.

I'm grateful for my family...not just those who started out as Grannis', also those who are Foutz Family.  Everyone in our family teaches us so much.   I learn things from everyone in our family and I grow because I am watching and learning.  It's such a blessing to be a part of something like that.

Today started with me NOT enduring well, it's hard to find something I want to eat that doesn't make me feel sick and when I take to long to decide I feel sick and then don't want to eat and it's just an awful cycle and it gets me down.  I feel bad for being sick even though Jake doesn't mind (he's such a trooper).  And then I think of the article I read about enduring well.  So I had a bagel with cream cheese...which always helps....not super healthy, but not super unhealthy either.  I stretched and did some light yoga to try and get some energy.  I announced my pregnancy (what a weight off)...weird how that was freeing.  Now I'm writing about it and getting over it.  I'm grateful for the opportunities I have everyday to learn and grow.

I'm thinking about having an orange...doesn't that sound good?  How cool is it that we can pull something off a tree and eat it!  Small miracles huh?

Today can be a good day....if I choose for it to be!